Tuesday, 30 October 2012

Mal's skinky skitterleap adventures - lizos vs vc

Alright Guys its Mal, everyones token lil ethnic friend.

So apologies, I was meant to do an amazing bat rep for my boy Ben, but alas I have shite memory and I forgot to take photo's half the time. If anything I have written below didn't actually happen in the game - I don't care. I'm use my dramatic license. Or I'm just plain lying. I took photos in 2 games but did take some photos for best presented. So enjoy.

So, its Skitterleap tomorrow (Imagine me writing this Friday) in Wellington, the flights were booked months ago and I'm taking my filth ETC lizardmen list. I Like Wellington tournaments, this one is being run by Pete D and he runs a tight ship. I know from previous tournament the tables will be well set out, trophies will be ready, rounds will be well spaced out. Generally just a well organised machine.
So what's in my list, well its one of the most annoying lil lizzy cnut list that I've ever played. The sort of list that gives all Lizardmen players a bad name. The kind to give people nightmares, not as bad as the list I took to clash of titans in the UK. I took 16 terradons in that one, oh yeah.

So..................here's a quick run down.

Slann on metal, -1 to hit in CC, 2+ ward from ranged attacks, +D6 to cast, BSB and Banner of discipline cause all Slann are disciplined like shaolin monks right. Dispel scroll and Soul stone. He's a monk right, they can go all matrix on your ass and make sure that gaping hole in the floor never appears. Don't forget everyone likes a lil bling: so a cheeky Final transmutationn turning everyone to gold like that James Bond film. Or having really hot spoons (Searing doom) being thrown at you, thats gonna hurt. Gangsta.

Scar vet, re-rollable armour save, magical and poison gw, his mate Scar-vet with charmed shield and 4+ ward, cause have you ever meet a scar-vet who couldn't take cannonball to the face. well the first one anyway. And scar-vets get lonely as well so they have to come in pairs like gerbils or hamsters.

Lvl 1 priest with a cube and his mate with curse charm of Tepok, cause its always funny watching your opponents wizard falling in a hole.

Then the rest of my chaff aka mean ass killing ninja machines.

3 x 21 Skinks Cohort with Javelins
3 x 12 Skinks Skirmishers with Javelins
3 x 6 Camo Skinks
3 x 3 Terradons
2 Salamander
2 x 1 Razordons

The rest of the armies list can be found here http://www.thefieldsofblood.com/2012/10/skitterleap-2012-lists.html

So what the the plan, well....................say pew pew pew pew pew alot shout "take it off" alot and generally be a gamey cnut. This army is not meant to get in to combat, its death by a thousand cuts, and whittle down the enemy till a cohort can kick the crap out of it. So all those horde list are no problem, tip is to maximise all fire power, drops rock, Final trans or Searing Spoons push the skinks right in there face right, shoot them, then shoot em again when they charge you. Win win. Also choose to roll 6's or :) smiley faces and poison that shit that always helps.

Run the Scar-vet as road blocks they should hold most things................. hopefully.

Ok so that the plan, I get to Wellywood, and crash at my mates Locky's place, he a stand in player for the weekend if anyone's drops out at the last minutes or we need a sub. So over a few beers, we go through some of the lists and trying to figure out how the heck you can kill Billy and his 90 mini-me's. Double Terrogit list, Terror bomb WOC list. Kitchen sink lizard list.

Maximum big ups to my a boy J check out his blog http://thebrushofdoom.blogspot.co.nz/ for the lift to and from the event. I felt that the the roles of driving Miss Daisy had been reversed.

So game 1 Dawn Attack - Random deployment and I'm playing Glen, with his VC double Terroghesit list with 8 of those ghouls on roids. I've never played Glen before, seen him around and I have to say that he is a genuinely really nice chap. So for the full list check of the above link. The 2 photos I took show the set up, for Glen top to bottom goes like this, wolves, 8 roid-ghouls, ghoul king and mates, terrogit, terrogit zombies with necro, zombies with necro, bats zombies.

my deployment top to bottom: camo skinks, chaf, slann, chaf, Teradons, chaf. I had set the Skink cohorts in lines of 2 so they can all shoot. for the priest I had rolled comet and ice shard and the Slann had, enchanted blades, Techni-coloured dream cloak -Glittering-robe, Transmutation of lead and you guessed it Gold, Always believe in your soul, You've got the power to know, You're indestructible, Always believe, because you are Gold

I lost the dice roll to set-up first, so Glen deployed first and then my boys went down. I then had to roll to seize the initiative, I'd set up to go 2nd amd I hadn't vanguard cause I was quite frankly terrified of the terrogits. lucky or unlucky I rolled that cheeky smiley face and could go first. Nothing really happened this turn other then some general shuffling and the camo skinks running behind the massive sphinx. Glenn's first turn was equally uneventful and saw the terrogits shuffle away from the direction the camo skinks were going. He pushed forward the roid-ghouls and ghoul king bus in between the 2 sphinx and zombies also pushed forward.

On to Turn 2, now I've played 8th ed as long as the next man and I have to say that I have never had my hobby wrecked, but alas I have hobby wrecked others, and Glen to his credit took it on the chin. Turn 2 saw some more shuffling of the camo skinks round the sphinx to shoot the roid-ghouls. The scar vet ran forward and started to get in the way of the roid-ghouls as plan B so they couldn't charge some skinks get a cheeky over run into the Slann. All the skinks ran forward to Javelin the shit out of the ghoul block making a B line for the Slann.
Seeing the danger the terradons started to run towards the Slann so they could be feed to Undead horde as Plan C. Whats Plan A well................. the magic phase happens and its average. I start to predict the future and tell Glenn exactly whats going to happen, now apparently any ol' monkey can play 8th ed, and god bless Hanuman the Hindu god of monkeys I've 6 diced monkey'd with the best of them. So I grab my six dice, point to the big 35 ghoul unit with Ghoul king, Wight king 2 Cairn Wraith. Say Final Transmutation...........Double Smiley Face. I point to the Ghoul King, kiss my dice...............roll it and Smiley face it up good and proper "Take it OFF".
(Now I had to apologies to Glenn as coming from the ETC I thought he had look out sir from this but he didn't and I knew this was a hobby killer. But Glen being the top guy that he was took it on the chin, and I have to say he got my best sports for the tournament. I have to say a little bit of me felt bad, only a little bit mind.) I also manage to Gold up some of the Ghouls and one of the cairn wraiths. In the aftermath of all the undead melting, the wolves and bats died out right and 5 wounds to one terrogit but Glen had some necromancer keeping things together. The miscast was something poo, so the Slann was quite pleased with himself. In the shooting phase I managed to get the salamander and a cohort and Skirmishers and razordon to open fire on the remainder of the ghouls. Leaving unit pretty decimated.

Glen's turn 2 say saw desperate measures, the Cairn wraith in the ghoul block charges out at the razrodon, the razordon was too far away so had to shoot the ghost. The roid boys attempt a charge against so skinks but fail, The Terrogits move a full 20" towards the skinks to say boo at the them killing a couple  would cause a few panic test but if nothing happens then its a big risk as they could zulu dawn them. Glen's go full out super aggressive all out. Zombies are making a massive move forward zombie style. Magic Phase and Glenn zaps one of the scar vet and gets spirit leeched, ouch. Glen also zaps a unit of Skink skirishers with the fire ball ring causing them to panic and make a dash for the safety of the board edge. The terrogits say boo, but its a whisper. The cairn wraith proper smashes up the razordon overruns towards the Slann.

Turn 3 No charges surprise surprise, the camo skinks finally get round the back of the sphinx and behind the roid-boys to poke them in the bum. The other razordon takes one for the team(like when your mate has to get off with the fat bird so you can have the one that doesn't look like shes works in KFC), and runs infront of the cairn wraith, then all the terradons drop rocks on the roid-boys. I send another skirmisher unit in front of the wight king and handful of ghouls, Magic and I cast enchanted blades on the cohort in front of roid boys, as I know they are in trouble if I can't get them down to  a manageable level. Glen stops all the other spells I try to attempt. In the shooting phase the 2 terrogits get zulu dawned, Glen made a gamble but it didn't work out and they go down. With the drop rocks and all the shooting from the camo skinks and cohort thats standing in front of them, they lose 5 out of the 8 leaving only 3 with a cairn wraith. Glen keeping up with the aggression charges the fleeing unit of skinks with some zombies, they run off the board. They then re-direct into a cohort, I know my skinks can't win this battle so they flee as well, they in turn get charged by the other unit of zombies having to flee twice off the board. Great the left flank is falling fast. (Dead, skirmish unit, cohort and scar-vet) Glen is moping up, but I can't afford those zombies to move to fast. The Fat chick Cairn Wraith jumps on the razordon. The Wight King unit charges the skinks in front

The skink ninjas are on fire, they kill all the ghouls with a stand a shoot and stand toe to toe with the wight king. The roid boys charge the enchanted blade skinks and another couple die before the finally make to combat. Glen tries to spirit leech the other scar-vet, I have to use a scroll or cube for this, the scar vet not to happy about this and spend the rest of the game running for a corner. Glen starts to raise zombies, not just a couple but like a million those 20 strong units are nearly 30-40 strong now. The combat phase see the Fat chick Cairn Wraith abuse the razordon like Jimmy Saville and a you know whom. The Wight King proper smashes up the skink unit and they run never to return from combat, Glen decides not to pursue so that he can bail in the zombie unit nearby next turn. The enchanted bladed skinks kick the crap out of the roid boys.

Turn 4 Sees me look at the board, and I know I'm up, Glen has lost a heap of stuff and really only has 3 units of zombies, a Wight king, a cairn wraith left and Wizards. There's a cairn wraith right up near my Slann, and the only thing that can handle the Wight king is the scar-vet who's hiding in the corner scared of his mojo being stolen by the death wizard.

I start to move all my army backwards away from the left flank where the zombie horde is coming from. I manage to enchanted blades some skinks to shoot the last fat chick cairn wraith. Glen jumps the Wight King in a zombie horde for some safety.

Turn 5 Uneventful as neither of us want commit and the zombies are now 50 strong uh oh.

Turn 6 See both of us move backwards, Glen doesn't have the range with the death magic and FD is 36" with the Slann moving 8" I don't want the old boy falling in a hole in the last turn.

And that was game 1, 16-4 win, it was always going to be tough once the choppy Ghoul king had died, Glen did everything right after that and managed to mop up some points, great fun game and Glen was a top bloke.

I'll try and get the rest done this week  


  1. i dont know what happened mal, after i uploaded those photos you sent me, i noticed some stink lines had appeared. very odd

  2. I love your writing Mal, something very, gamey cnut about it. I don't know what it was, but the batrep just kept me smiling.

    Probably those damn dice of your ;D.